everytime i look at this empty space (a brand new post)
i don't feel like typing anything
i'm afraid of this emptiness, it's like giving out a very sad aura
makes me feel like posting only emo stuffs, can't bring myself to type all those happy things
like very fake like that ):
people often say the best way to heal heartaches is to find another guy, true enough
although it's unfair to the guy but indeed it does help to divert my attention
so much so to an extent that sometimes i don't even know what am i thinking, do i really know who am i talking to?
it's like i mixed up reality and my dreams
that's bad, very bad, i might as well continue to deceive myself further by changing the names to haroy soh
it might not be right but at least all these bad stuffs make me feel happier in a way
i guess that's all that matters at this moment
sorry
anyway, today i think i'm really kind of proud of myself
i finally gave up working at imm for a week to avoid him
i know no matter where i am as long as i'm working i'll think of him.
being able to see the person i love for 10 straight hours is a bliss, going for lunch together and even going home together at times.
but now i know i'm all by myself already, i have to learn to be independent once again.
and i hate that! why must i learn to be independent?
why can't there be someone i can rely on forever?
why can't people just keep their promises?
why bother to give me promises when you don't bother to keep them?
suddenly i feel like i'm riding the spaceshot at genting.
you brought me so high up in the air, making me feel like the most fortunate girl in the world, showering me with all the love and concern
but the next moment before i'm prepared for it, you threw me down all the way to the ground so hard that i'm bruise all over, taking away all the happiness that i thought belonged to me, taking away all the love in my life, do you know how badly you've hurt me?
it's not gonna help with just one sorry.
you can't just throw me away with one sorry but we're not suitable.
all those are just bullshit!
guys being guys are always heartless bastards
no exceptions!
at least up till now all the guys i met are.
after ranting so much, i feel much better, much peaceful in my heart
i guess i'm able to sleep now(:
i think i'm gonna get split personality soon! haha
anyway on a lighter note, i got my pay today!
and it's like a new record for me! hehe
i've never got so much before, so i guess it's time for some serious shopping since it's GSS now!
darlingZHEN, dearieJILL time to go shopping!
oh and not forgetting to thank dearie for that pretty gerbera you bought for me!
will post it's photo in my next entry(:
seriously, i don't know how it would be without the support from all my dearest friends
without you guys i think i wouldn't be back on my feet so fast
your love gave me strength and courage to carry on.
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